Sunday, January 26, 2014

Reflections on 2013

I remember back to the days when I used to blog every day, or every couple of days. Even with nothing of importance to say other than the mundane every day stuff going on in my life, my blogging was an escape and I felt the need to capture every moment so I wouldn't forget them. Now, I live in the moment. I'm not attached to my blog or my camera the way that I used to be.

Since I turned 29 in October, it was as if something clicked that suddenly made me an "adult." I've been working hard to take the steps to get all of my finances in order. 2013 was the year that I paid off two of my credit cards and this year looks close to being the same. I'm in the process of having two of my student loans forgiven because I work in a state licensed child care center (friends who teach preschool-if you have a Perkins loan, look into their forgiveness program!) and my other loans are in a place where I can actually make payments on them. My phone doesn't ring off the hook anymore with debt collectors because everything is in repayment mode. I actually have money to live off of and while I still live paycheck to paycheck, I don't stress out about finances as much as I used to. My car will be paid off in the spring of 2015 and my final two credit cards won't be far behind.

The best part of my finances being in order is that I've been able to travel a little bit here and there. This past summer I spent a week in Disney and Vero Beach with my parents and my high school best friend, and then I also spent a week with my senior high youth kids at a conference at a college in Tennessee. 2014 also holds big adventures! Mariah and I just booked a seven night Caribbean cruise with Carnival for the week after Christmas when our preschool is closed. Three nights at sea, with stops in St. Maarten, San Juan, and Grand Turk! We're also staying the night before our cruise in Miami, which I've only ever been to once, the night before we flew out to go to Haiti two years ago. My wanderlust heart is beyond excited and I have spent the past 24 hours googling everything I can find on our ports of call, exploring the ship on Carnival's website, and dreaming of warmth since it's pretty much been snowing here in Ohio since early December, with no signs of stopping anytime soon. While it stinks to have to wait 11 months for a vacation, it will be well worth it in the end! :)

I think one of the biggest things I learned in 2013 was contentment. Throughout the majority of my 20s, I struggled with being content with God's timing and in being single. Watching friend after friend get married and start a family took a toll on my heart, but God gently reminded me that He is to be my all. His timing is perfect and His plans are way better than my own. I signed myself up for a year long Disciple Bible study that is working me through the Old Testament and shining a light into my life that I needed to see. I also joined a women's small group that meets on Thursday evenings. It was originally a four week follow up to the women's retreat I went on back in November, but we enjoyed meeting together so much that we decided to keep going with meeting on Thursday nights. We're currently talking about priorities and boundries in our lives while working through Balancing It All by Candace Cameron Bure. I've come to cherish my Thursday nights and the amazing ladies that bring so much joy to my life. It's the one place I've come to feel as if I can be real and vulnerable and they'll love me despite the messiness of life and the things I struggle with.

One of the greatest blessings to my life this year has been the youth ministry. I've been a youth sponsor since 2009, but this year I feel as if God has really been nudging me to pour my heart and soul into these kids. I currently mentor two of our senior high girls who I love dearly and spend quality time with most of the kids twice a week during youth Bible study and Sunday night worship. It's been a blessing to watch them grow together and to become a family this year, something we adults have been praying for over the past several years.

I learned this year who my friends are, the people who have surrounded me with love, grace, and joy on a daily basis. Some of them are scattered and we're separated by miles and hours, but I know all I have to do is pick up the phone or send them an email, and they'll drop everything for me. I gained one very dear friend, a coworker who has stuck by my side since summer and who probably doesn't realize how much I cherish her friendship. She has listened to me vent, I'm fairly certain she potentially has seen me cry, and she has loved me despite the ugliness of the battles we've fought together. I can't imagine what both my life and work would be like without her friendship. When I look at my life, I no longer have multiple "best friends." Instead, I have a circle of close friends, people who build me up, encourage me, and love me for who I am. We've all been together for so long that I can't imagine what life would be like without them.

I used to dread turning 29, knowing it was the end of my 20s and thinking that I was going to be old by turning 30. Instead, I look forward to this year and the exciting things I know God has planned for my life. I'm slowly learning to become okay with the fact that I may never get married (I have several friends who keep pushing me and telling me I need to move or switch churches to find a husband-not going to happen!) and I'm learning what it means to be content in who I am and who Christ calls me to be. My identity is not found in a husband, my job, or my finances. It is found in Jesus, who wants nothing more than my utmost devotion and my heart.

Here's to 2014...new adventures, better finances, and a life full of love and laugther. I can't wait to see what this year holds. :)