Sunday, February 2, 2020

Life begins at the end of your comfort zone


I was texting earlier tonight with my friend Aaron, who has also become my personal trainer, and we were talking about how nothing good comes from staying where you are comfortable. We were discussing the fact that I am allowing him into a very vulnerable area of my life and I know there are times I'm going to want to quit because I am uncomfortable and don't like the idea of allowing him to speak truth, but by pushing out of my comfort zone, I am opening myself to the idea of growth.

As we were talking, I was thinking about all the times that I've stepped outside of my comfort zone, how nervous and unsure I was, but looking back, I can see all the victories that came from those moments. I've always been the type of person who doesn't like to take a risk, who has allowed fear and uncertainty to creep in, and to stay where it's been easy. But in the past several years, I look back and I see where I took a leap of faith and the amazing things that came from it.

In 2014, I left the church I grew up in to go to Crossroads. I felt stalled in my faith and I was craving community with people my own age. Not only has my faith grown by leaps and bounds, but I found the community I was craving and I've grown into a leader who builds into others. I was baptized in 2016 in New Orleans on a Go trip and began to untangle the lies that I grew up listening to. I've started to fully understand my identity as a child of God and what it means to be loved unconditionally.

In 2015, I moved out of my parents house for the first time (other than college) and lived with one of my best friends. Living on my own presented it's own challenges but in that year, I let go of my finances and entrusted them into the hands of two of my married friends I trusted with my life and I allowed them to speak truth into a very sensitive area. I have since paid off all of my credit cards, paid off one of my student loans, and another one will be paid off next month! I learned how to budget and because of them, when I lost my job back in October, I didn't have to worry (as much) because I had some money tucked back into my savings account.

In 2015, I stepped down from my lead teacher position at a job I was comfortable at and took a part time job at CFS that allowed me to begin fulfilling my school counseling passion. I was blessed to work alongside two of my best friends, and a year later, I was able to leave the preschool completely and went full time at CFS. I built our school program to be successful to the point that we had a waiting list for our school groups, and I built relationships with school staff who made me the professional I am now. For four years, I got to watch the lives of students change every year. I watched them have breakthroughs and let down their guards to allow me in to show them what it means to have one caring adult in their life who believed in them. I was devastated when we closed in October, but I will forever be thankful for those four years.

In 2017, I said yes to a girl I had never met before, someone who sent me a DM on Instagram, where we bonded over our love for education and Jesus. I had secretly followed her fitness journey and her freedom for a year before I finally said yes to a free group she was running, thinking I would never stick with an at home program. Two and a half years later, I am in the BEST shape of my life, getting amazing reports from my doctor, and have just said another yes to one of my good friends who is a personal trainer, committing to once a week sessions with him to take my health and fitness journey to a whole new level. I found freedom from the emotional eating I struggled with for so long, and I am finally beginning to break the strongholds with my eating issues by trying new foods.

When we were chatting tonight, one of Aaron's final comments to me was "Eventually you'll look back through the rear view mirror with gratitude. Keep your eyes focused ahead right now. Let's get it in 2020. The best is yet to come!" Those words are going to be written on post-its and placed in different places that I can see them because he's right: when I look back over the past six years and see the growth that has happened from leaving my comfort zone, I am filled with gratitude. I am not where I used to be. Instead, I am stronger, healthier, and happier. There have been many, many ups and downs over the past six years, but each bump in the road has added to my story and made me that much stronger.

Bring in on 2020. I am ready for the best that is still waiting to happen!

1 comment:

Terrence McKenzie said...

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